A Day Like No Other--Remembering 9/11

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!   

         Where were you on September 11, 2001?  There is probably no one over the age of twenty who doesn't remember.  So it goes with tragic world events.  As we approach the 10th anniversary of those nightmarish hours and their aftermath, it is fitting and proper to remember those who were lost, and to say a prayer for their families who, no doubt, are still grieving. 
         Grieving takes a long time.  I know, having lost my father at a very young age.  It seemed strange to me, in my twenties, that I couldn't watch a young woman hug her dad without feeling an overwhelming sense of grief and longing.  I think, with greater maturity, I have come to understand that losing a loved one will always leave a tender aching; a place of pain that never fully heals. 
         And so, as we approach this weekend, be kind, there are many souls who are sensitive and sorrowing.  As we look back, through news stories, video, and Ground Zero events, feelings of anger, insecurity and grief may come flooding back.  Each of us will remember what we lost that day, but those who had loved ones snatched from their lives will feel a special private and intense pain.

         I remember that September morning.  I was going about my business, looking for a job.  Suddenly my interview was interrupted by a phone call.  The interviewer looked a little stunned, but said nothing and went on with our conversation.  A half minute later her phone rang again.  This time there was a look of utter horror.  She began crying and explained to me that two planes had flown into the Twin Towers in New York City, and another plane had flown into the Pentagon.  Our nation was under attack. 



The Gold Star Memorial Bridge, spanning the Thames River between New London and Groton, Connecticut



         I was in New London, Connecticut at the time, not far by air from New York City.  The Thames River lies between New London and my hometown of Stonington.  On that river, just north of the bridge I needed to cross, is the Naval Submarine Base at Groton.  I immediately left the interview, watching the sky, wondering if this bridge might also be a target.  If it was hit, its collapse would prevent any submarine at the base from leaving port.  I was scared, and I just wanted to be with my family.

         When I left home that day, it was a beautiful end of summer morning--a morning like so many others.When thousands of New York City residents left their homes to go to work at the Twin Towers they were also simply going about their routine business.  They kissed a spouse good-bye, dropped children off at school, or stopped to buy gasoline or pick up a newspaper.  How could they know that everything was about to change in the most unimaginable way? 
         We just never know what any day will bring.  September 11, 2001 was the last day on earth for thousands of people, and the beginning of sorrow for millions more.  Any day might be a day of sorrow or of unimaginable joy.  Whatever today brings, it is the very best day to show our love, give someone a hug, share a smile, and express our gratitude to family and friends.  Life and loved ones are so precious, and unthinkable as it may seem, we may not have another chance!


TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:           
Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.
                                                                                           Margaret Cousins, writer 

Gotta Love That Zucchini !

         Have you ever wondered what your life would be like without friends?  My friends are a mainstay and a strength, and there are days when their kindness and support mean everything to me.  I just love them. 
         As I've been thinking about ways to relax, and the ones I like most, I couldn't help but think of my friend, Jessica.  A couple weeks ago Jess brought over some chocolate zucchini cake.  Never had it?  Neither had I, but it only took one bite to realize this would be a favorite.  In fact, I can think of nothing nicer on a cool September morning than a square of chocolate zucchini cake (yes, folks, I'm with Bill Cosby--chocolate cake for breakfast!), and a cup of warm herbal tea; oh, so relaxing and delicious.  You'll especially appreciate it if you're a mom with children still at home.  Imagine, you've gone through all the craziness of corralling the kids and herding them out the door to school.  The door clicks shut (or BANGS!) and the house is suddenly quiet.  Now is your moment.  Cut yourself a piece of cake, pour a cup of tea and let the peace sink in.     
         It's true, I'm retired and my children graduated from school long ago, so I don't have to wait for the door to slam.  But I remember those days so clearly, and I figured I shouldn't keep something this good to myself.  So, here is my relaxation gift to you--Jessica's recipe.  I hope you'll treat yourself to its moist texture and chocolaty delicious taste.  If it's been a really tough morning go ahead and have two pieces.
You have my permission!
        CHOCOLATE ZUCCHINI CAKE    

First Cream Together:

1/2 Cup Margarine, I've used real butter and it tastes just as yummy.

1/2 Cup Vegetable oil

1 3/4 Cups White Sugar

Add: 

2 Eggs

1T Vanilla

1/2 Cup Milk

Then Mix in:

2 1/2 Cups Flour

4 T Cocoa, I tend to add more 

1/2 t Baking Powder

1t Baking Soda 

1/2 t Cinnamon

1/2 t Cloves

Once you've added and mixed in all the above ingredients stir in 2 Cups finely grated zucchini.  Keep stirring until all zucchini is mixed in. Pour into a 9X12 greased and floured pan. Sprinkle with 1/4 Cup of chocolate chips. Bake at 350 for 35-40 mins. Poke with a knife and if it comes out clean it's done.  Let cool for about 15 mins then dust generously with Powdered Sugar. ENJOY!!!

***A cute apron and fun music are key while making this cake because it makes a huge mess and messes are more fun to make when you're singing! *** 

*********************************************************************************

Thanks, Jessica.  This is a hit!  I hope all my blog readers will try it.

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:        JESSICA.   I'M  SO HAPPY  THAT  HER  MOM  TAUGHT  HER  TO  SHARE!

More Ways to Relax

          One of my favorite ways to connect to a greater sense of gratitude is through relaxation.  It just eases the stress and opens the heart, helping us to be more aware of all the treasures that surround us.  So, from time to time I will dedicate a few posts to relaxation techniques.  You will recall that I did 3 relaxation posts during the week of 8/1/2011 through 8/5/2011.  But there are lots of other ways to "chill", so today I'm going to share my 10 All Time Favorite Ways to Relax.  There's more to it than just a list, however.  In fact, the list will become the relaxation exercise.  How?  You'll see!

My 10 All Time Favorite Ways to Relax  

1.  Sailing on Long Island Sound
2.  Walking in the woods
3.  Listening to summer night sounds as I drift off to sleep

4.  Listening to the sound of gentle rain  with thunder in the distance

5.  Sitting quietly with a cup of hot chocolate while watching snow fall

6.  Taking a hot bath with lavender oil and epsom salts

7.  Walking on the beach
8.  Listening to the roar of a cascading waterfall
9.  The sound of birds singing at dawn on a spring morning
10. A professional massage 

         Unfortunately, it isn't spring every day, I can no longer go sailing on Long Island Sound, it doesn't always rain on cue, and I can't often afford a professional massage.  What to do?  According to an article on Mempowered (http://www.memory-key.com/memory/emotion), positive memories contain many contextual details.  Interesting!  I can choose any one of my top 10 favorites and simply remember it.  Memory can be a very powerful thing, and positive memories are best of all!  So, for this exercise,the relaxation will actually be found within the memory.  As I remember, I relax, and silently think of exactly how I felt at the time I experienced that activity--what I heard, saw, smelled, felt, etc.  I savor every detail of that event, and I simply live in that space mentally for 10 or 15 minutes.   Or, I choose 2 or 3 of my "favorites"  and relax with them for a few minutes each, going from one wonderful experience to the other.  I don't allow my mind to drift into "If onlys"  as in "If only I could go there again," or "if only so-and -so was here again to share that experience", etc.  This is a time for peace.  I allow my memory to take me through my experience.  I simply enjoy it--every gratifying, sensory, wonderful minute of it! 
         Relaxing into a pleasant memory can produce the feeling that we have been transported through time and space to actually experience that very special event all over again. This technique can induce a deep sense of peace and happiness, and help us to move on to the tasks of the day feeling refreshed and uplifted. 

         Now that you've seen my Top 10 Favorite Ways to Relax, consider composing your own list.  When you can't physically engage in the way you might most want to relax, you can still relish its details.  Use your memory of it to help bring about your own deep sense of refreshment.  Labor Day, after all, is about appreciating how hard we all work for our living, relaxing from those labors, and taking a break from the every day demands.  So, have a picnic or bar-b-que, go boating, take a hike, or just spend a little time enjoying some quiet.


TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:  DO SOMETHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY:  RELAX! 

        



1. 
   

The Things We Take For Granted

Note: Great news!  Even though the power in Southeastern Connecticut was expected to be out until at least Saturday, I kept calling my sister's phone number--just hoping.  On Wednesday night she answered!  It was so good to talk to her.  I'm counting my blessings!

         We're all blessed in a lot of different ways.  Some of our blessings seem so commonplace that we may regard them more as "rights" than the godsend they are. A place to live, a bed to sleep in, food to eat, these are everyday necessities, and most of us probably don't think a whole lot about them.   Most of us.  Some people, however, really can't get these basic requirements out of their minds because they're needs that are left chronically unfulfilled. 
         As I promised in my last entry, today I'm going to address one of those needs--hunger. There are people who face a lack of food every day. Due to unemployment or underemployment they struggle to buy just a few groceries.
         Although, as individuals, we can't address every deficiency in the world, hunger is one thing that most of us can do something about.  There are so many people in our nation--the greatest nation on earth--who will go to bed tonight hardly able to sleep because of the discomfort of an empty stomach.  There are parents worried sick about how to feed their children.  There are children worried about the stress their parents are under, AND there are those of us who have a little extra we could share.
         I recently saw a news story about the central food bank in our state.  From there other food banks in many counties receive supplies for needy families.  Because of the poor economy, the demand for assistance is far greater than it would normally be at this time of year.  However, the shelves at the central food bank are nearly empty.

          I've also been watching a series on ABC News called Hunger In America.  Their finding: 1 in 6 Americans don't have access to enough food.  That's millions of people!  But many of us can do a little, with many small efforts adding up to a considerable amount of help for those who are struggling.

          Is there something in our pantry that we could contribute?  Almost all communities have drop off points for food donations.  Community centers, food banks, supermarkets and other locations are waiting and anxious to receive our offerings.  At these sites we can give a gift that is large or small--whatever we can afford.  ABC News has a website with information for finding the location of food pantries in every state.  They also make it easy to give a monetary donation.  For more information go to the Internet and search:  Hunger in America: How to Help-ABC News.
         Not everyone can give.  I understand

A Local Food Bank

that.  Some wonderful people who have never known want before are barely getting by right now. But no matter what our situation, we can pray for those in need.  Many would give if they could, and their  sincere intent counts big time.  That intent, coupled with prayer, can call down the powers of heaven to bless those whose needs are so great.  
         So, whether we give a tangible gift of food, or give ourselves over to prayer, or both, what gratitude should fill our hearts that we have something to give.  What a great feeling to be able to share a little from our abundance of food and faith to relieve someone's hunger--maybe even their fear--and help them to sleep more soundly tonight. 

TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:    HOW WONDERFUL IT IS THAT NOBODY NEED WAIT A SINGLE MOMENT BEFORE STARTING TO IMPROVE THE WORLD.          Anne Frank 

Bloom Where You're Planted

         Right now hundreds of thousands of people on the east coast are struggling in the aftermath of Hurricane Irene.  Some without flood insurance have lost everything of temporal value.  A few have suffered the ultimate loss, the death of a loved one.  A great number are still without power.  I've been calling my sister's house for 3 days--no answer.  No power.  No phone.  Although I haven't made contact with her, other friends with cell phones tell me there was little damage in her location.  My niece's husband contacted me by Facebook this morning (ain't technology wonderful?!) and assured me they are all fine.  I'm so relieved, but looking forward to hearing my sister's voice before too long.  The power will be back on by next week Rob tells me.  Maybe as soon as Saturday, if they're lucky.


Flooding in Vermont  (Photo by Jeanne Buck)

          When I think of how significantly life has changed for some people over the last few days, my heart aches for their losses. My prayers are for a sense of peace to bless them right now, in their hurt.  Hurricanes can be devastating and recovery can take a very long time.  In fact, the aftermath of the hurricane causes me to consider how many other kinds of needs there are, all around us.  When the sun is shining and the days are calm, it's easy to believe that life will always be good.  However, nature can remind us very quickly of the real nitty gritty problems that exist.  Those problems need to be addressed, and we can help address them.  Look around.  You and I may not be able to get on a plane and fly to the east coast to help with clean up and relief efforts after this storm, but there are needs in our own communities that we can help to meet. In Friday's post I will be addressing one of those specific concerns.      
         In the meantime, I will be pondering my blessings.  I have so many!  I will also be looking around to see who needs a visit, a casserole, a smile, a prayer, or some other help, and I will try to fill that void.  Although I would love to be in Connecticut with family, there are also those, in my own neighborhood, who could benefit from an expression of concern, a little love. 
         "Bloom where you're planted," I've been told.  Hurricanes or no hurricanes, this is a very good season for blooming!

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:   I'VE HEARD FROM MANY EAST COAST FRIENDS AND FAMILY WHO ARE FINE AND MOSTLY UNAFFECTED BY THE HURRICANE. 

After the Storm

         The big news, of course, has been the hurricane on the east coast.  With so many of my family and friends living near the Atlantic Ocean, it is good to know that things weren’t as bad as they might have been.  It’s always wonderful, when we make contact after a storm, to express our love and relief that, although there have been disruptions, everything is alright. 

The Eye of  a  Massive Hurricane

         Sometimes we’re aware that storms are coming.  Sometimes they take us by surprise.  Hurricanes can be tracked.  We usually spot them forming off the west coast of Africa and we can measure their speed and progress as they approach the United States.  Other storms can’t be anticipated and can be very difficult, if not impossible, to track.  I’ve become aware of quite a few of these storms lately—most specifically since I’ve joined the Facebook world.  The storms I’m talking about are the more personal storms that come into lives causing disruptions, fear, and sometimes devastating consequences.

         In the past week or two I’ve learned that friends from my past have suffered many difficult—sometimes life threatening—even life taking—situations.  One friend’s dad lost his teaching job after 25 years.  As a result they lost their home.  Two weeks after moving into a more affordable home my friend’s mom passed away, totally unexpectedly, in the middle of the night.  Another friend told me about her sister whose 26 year old son died from a heart condition and within a short time after that her sister's husband also passed away.  A third friend suffered a life threatening bout of double pneumonia and a heart attack within the space of just a couple of years.  When I caught up with her she was suffering other physical ailments that kept her in significant pain.  And yet another friend just finished her last round of chemo for breast cancer.

         I’m sure if you survey your friends and relatives you will find many who are experiencing, or have experienced, extremely difficult circumstances.  Maybe you are in the middle of a howling storm yourself.  Most of these situations come unexpectedly—storms we don't see forming and, perhaps, can’t track. Nevertheless, they are very real.  It's great when a storm passes and we can survey the damage and breathe a sigh of relief, knowing we have come through relatively unscathed.  But many create losses that are painful and permanent.  How do we deal with those storms?

        I believe that it might well be impossible if not for the love and support of family and friends.  I remarked to one of my friends, who had experienced life threatening illnesses, that she sounded very cheerful.  Her response was, “Your whole outlook on life changes when you’re given, not once but twice, the chance to live. So I always try to stay cheerful.  Life is wonderful when you can be here with the ones you love!”   Isn’t that a great attitude, and a wonderful recognition of what is really important?!

         As Hurricane Irene churned up the Atlantic seaboard I made phone calls and expressed my concern and love to family and friends who were in the line of fire. They would have done the same for me.  How grateful I am that, when the storms of life come upon us, if we are fortunate, we are not alone.  There are loved ones near and far who are letting us know of their concern, and who will be there to help us in the aftermath.  Their expressions of affection, their support, comfort and aid are priceless and precious manifestations that before, during and after the storm there is love. 

TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:   LET A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CARE.  MAKE A SPECIAL EFFORT TO EXPRESS YOUR LOVE TO SOMEONE WHO IS ILL OR SUFFERING.  OR EXPRESS YOUR GRATITUDE THAT THEY'VE COME THROUGH THEIR STORM, AND THEY'RE ALRIGHT.

The Goodness That is YOU

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         Someone asked me the other day if I was feeling a little sentimental.  I replied, "No, I don't think so."  Then he referenced my blogs from earlier this week.  I laughed.  Guess I got caught strolling down memory lane.  But there's nothing wrong with a little exercise that brings you back into contact with the great people and experiences you've known.  However, to spare you from my nostalgia, I will address a different kind of topic today--the blessing of being POSITIVE.
         I've commented more than once that there is so much good in the world that it isn't difficult to find many reasons for being grateful.  But what about the good IN YOU, that goodness that IS YOU?  I sometimes think, if we could just understand how really awesome we are, we would be absolutely EXCITED about life and about all our possibilities for affecting the world around us in marvelous ways.  I don't mean that in a "Look at me.  Look how wonderful I am" way.  In fact, the very thought of how special we are is extremely humbling.
         We all came from God.  Having come from our great Creator, we also contain a bit of divinity.  Though much of that divine light may be dimmed by this moral life, that light is still within us, and we can, given enough thought and effort, access it.  But how do we do that?
          My formula:

• First, believe in the goodness that is you.  Believe that you are a bit of divinity, placed here upon this earth to do good and to be an influence that uplifts and helps others.  Believe that humbly and with thanksgiving.
• Second, spend a little time each day just sitting quietly and letting that belief sink into your soul. Ponder what it means and how you can use it for good.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone."  You must take time to be still and listen for the quiet whisperings of the Spirit--the spirit of God speaking to that bit of divinity within you.  
• Third, choose a quotation, scripture, or inspired thought that you can easily memorize that sums up that belief.  Here are a few suggestions, but any positive message will do if it reminds you that you are capable and of value:

If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.  Thomas Edison

What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man that thou visitest him?  For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour."  (Psalms 8:4-5  KJV)

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.  Vincent Van Gogh

Prepare your mind to receive the best that life has to offer.  Ernest Holmes

• Forth and last, go out and DO.  Act upon the belief that you have an important purpose in life and the power to accomplish that purpose.

         If that all seems a little heady or too "out there", believe me, there is absolutely nothing wrong with putting a positive spin on life.  There are certainly enough negative messages in the world.  Contemplating the goodness within ourselves, and the goodness we can achieve, will help to counter those messages.  Whether our purpose is to be the best parent, the best doctor, the best grocery store clerk or the best friend we can be, each of us can go about the world spreading the light of kindness and genuine concern for others.  
         We are extraordinary and unique, you and I.  We have the potential to bless the world in so many enriching and wonderful ways. We each have great capabilities and the power to achieve much good.  Wouldn't it be incredible if, together, we caused the light of that belief to shine so brilliantly that even those who doubt their value could begin to see it clearly? 


TODAY'S INSPIRING QUOTATION:  There is a basic law that like attracts like. Negative thinking definitely attracts negative results. Conversely, if a person habitually thinks optimistically and hopefully, his positive thinking sets in motion creative forces -- and success instead of eluding him flows toward him.    Norman Vincent Peale

Gratitude and Work

   
          Now that I've joined the Facebook generation, I've found myself wondering what will happen to my waistline.  Facebook, e-mail, researching information on the computer, that's a lot of time SITTING, and less time doing physical things.  It doesn't mean I'm not working--the computer has become an important work tool for me.  It does mean that my work has taken on a different hue.  One with which  I'm not yet completely comfortable.  I am, after all, from a different generation.
           One thing I noticed, as I was growing up, was the incredible work ethic of my grandparents.  Both sets of grandparents were always busy providing for the needs of their families, and that meant physical labor, and a lot of it!  Although they napped for a while each afternoon, in the hours before and after their rest they were working.  As a child, I watched my Grandpa Durfee and his sons build a house they would later sell to help provide for family needs.  I saw them helping one another, and helping my mom complete the construction of our home after my father died. 
         My dad's parents were Italian and they had a huge garden, a vineyard, orchard, and chestnut trees.  My grandpa and uncles were forever clearing away brush, weeding, pruning, planting and picking.  That was in addition to my uncles' regular employment away from home. 
         My aunts were busy cooking meals, doing laundry, tending children, encouraging civility and enterprise, and dispensing love in generally large doses.  My own mother did those things, as well.  When I was in Junior High School she returned to school to earn her degree as a licensed practical nurse.  She would later earn degrees as a registered nurse and a nurse practitioner. 
         I don't remember people sitting around too often with time on their hands.  However, there were periods of rest and recreation--playing bocce ball on the lawn, or watching a Saturday afternoon Red Sox or Yankees game on television at the Norcia farm.  And sometimes we'd go out to Sandy Point on the boat owned by my mom's brothers.  There we could spend a few hours picnicking and swimming.  We also had cousins and friends to play with.  However, these were generally "earned" privileges that came after our homework and chores were completed.  And we did have chores!  There was gardening to do, house cleaning, and tending the chickens.  Some of us had newspaper routes after school and on weekends.  As an additional part of our weekly routine, we were also expected to take our turns helping with the laundry and ironing, and with dinner preparations and clean up. 
          If all that sounds a little overwhelming, it wasn't.  It was the way life was, and it was healthy.  There were no computers, let alone computer games.  We had a party line with two neighboring families and often had to "wait our turn" to use the phone.  There were no 2 or 3 hour phone conversations with friends, and no begging for a phone of our own.  We asked before we plopped down on the living room rug to relax in front of a television show because watching T.V. was the exception.
         The other thing I remember about my grandparents, aunts and uncles, were their frequent expressions of gratitude for all they had. My Italian grandparents had moved to the United States to live and work in a Massachusetts mill town, just for the opportunity to have a better life than they had known in "the old country".   It wasn't until years later, with the help of an uncle, that they bought a small farm in rural Connecticut.  All the relatives in the generation before mine lived through a severe depression in this country.  They knew what "hungry" felt like, because they sometimes went to bed having eaten little or nothing.  They knew what moldy flour tasted like, because sometimes it was the only flour they had.  They knew the exhilaration of watching their gardens grow because they had taken the time to plant and tend them, but they knew more than that.  They were aware that sometimes all the planting and tending and watchful care in the world could come to nothing, because sometimes the earth did not produce if there was to much rain, or too little rain, or disease. Knowing how capricious nature can be, and how hard food was to come by, even from the grocer, they also knew a dependence upon God, and gratitude to their Creator for providing for their needs.  They knew that body aches and fatigue, even in productive years, were necessary to make the earth yield a harvest.  They knew the exertion required to catch a fine "haul" of fish.  And they knew that the after effects of sore muscles and aching joints were a whole lot better than the feeling of hungry.  
         Hard work, back then, was usually productive work.  I remember the joy on my Grandmother Durfee's face as she picked a bouquet of flowers she had grown in her yard, and my Grandpa Norcia proudly displaying the chicken eggs he had gathered from the coop and placed in his brimmed hat.  I remember my mother beaming with pleasure at the jars of canned beans, peaches, jams and soups she had "put up"; not to mention the freezer filled with produce she had blanched and packed away in plastic freezer boxes. I also remember the excitement as she earned her diploma in nursing.
         Am I stuck on living in the past?  I don't think so.  However, I am stuck on remembering that there used to be a physical component to life that was much more prevalent than it is today.  Sitting at the computer or playing with your cell phone seems, to me, to lead to more sedentary preoccupations, like games and texting--even while driving!  I simply fear that we will forget some really important things like: there are people to talk to--face to face; eyes to look in to, to see the sparkle of pride, or joy, or satisfaction reflected there; people to be listened to--really listened to--not just in passing, but with our full attention.  And even though the world has changed in many respects, there are still bodies that benefit from the pain of exertion and a little sweat pouring down the back during an afternoon of gardening, or building, or helping a friend in need; and minds that can be plied to think in new directions and learn new things.
         Yes, I am looking back a bit, but only because there is something to be learned there: hard work, whether mental or physical, feels great, and along with that feeling of satisfaction is the feeling of gratitude--gratitude that you CAN work; gratitude that your labors are productive; gratitude that what you have produced is blessing your family, and gratitude to God, from whom all blessing flow. Gratitude and hard work are twin attributes.  Working hard makes you grateful that you have the capacity to work, and that it produces fruit; and the fruit of your labor produces gratitude that your work has not been in vain.

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:  Thanks to Facebook and e-mail I made contact this week with 3 friends from my younger years.  We hadn't talked in such a long time!  So, you see, I'm not anti-technology.  I just have a great appreciation for focused, productive work.

School's Open

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.


West Broad Street Elementary School
Where It All Started For Me
Education, Friendships, Social Interaction



         For millions of kids across the USA this is the week that begins their new school year.  For millions more it will begin just after Labor Day.  How lucky are they?  I know that my sister in Florida has been busy for weeks preparing for her elementary school class.  I'm sure her head is spinning with ideas, and those kids are darn lucky to have Mrs. Simpler for their teacher. I wonder if they understand their good fortune.

         When I think of the kids in many African nations and other places around the world who would give anything for a pencil and pad of paper, or for the opportunity to have a school nearby, I have to wonder if, in this country, we know how really blessed we are.  I used to moan and groan about the end of summer, and dread the impending piles of homework.  I know I was one who probably took a good education for granted.  As I look back, I remember many wonderful teachers:  Mrs. Hustlebee in first grade;  Mrs. Blake in 5th;  Mr. Kravanek, Mrs. Fabricant and Mr. Pouliot in Junior High, and Mrs. Ostigny, Miss Silverstein, and Mrs. Nardone in High School.  There were many others, but those are the ones who stand out in my mind because they seemed to really care, not just about my education, but about helping me to be my best as an individual.
         And who can forget the friendships?  I hope Christine Murano has forgiven me for biting her in 1st grade--that was MY piece of puzzle, Christine!--Barbara, Suzanne, Linda, Judy, Mary, Tony, Mac and so many others. Do you remember buying comic books at Shea's, the class trip to Mystic Seaport, school dances, our high school performance of Strange Borders?
         I was a pretty shy kid, but not so withdrawn that I didn't notice I was surrounded by a lot of wonderful people, some who were friends from first grade through high school.  School provides that for us--a safe transition from the shelter of home into the larger world.  A way to begin spreading our wings, forming trusted relationships, discovering our abilities and, eventually, learning to fly.
         Reading, math, science and all the other subjects are, without a doubt, important.  However, school also provides a great laboratory for experimenting with getting along in the world:  practicing proper social conduct; learning sportsmanship; becoming a responsible member of the community. And in the midst of all that, we are blessed to learn self discipline, self confidence and self respect.
         So, as this school year begins, and you send those wee ones, and bigger ones, out the door, don't just breathe a sigh of relief that summer is over.  Take a moment to remember your own experiences with school, and all the wonderful people you knew, and possibly still know from those formative years.  How blessed we are that school, at its best, isn't just an institution for book learning.  It really is a place for learning about LIFE !


TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
CONSIDER CONTACTING A FRIEND FROM YOUR PAST IN SCHOOL TO THANK HIM OR HER FOR THE GREAT MEMORIES!

Living Gratitude

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

        Sometimes those closest to us are the most difficult to appreciate.  Why? Probably because, being who they are, they do nice things for us frequently and we sometimes take their thoughtfulness for granted.  It's also not UNlikely that they do things that irritate us and, we, being who we are (human), may focus on those annoyances rather than their helpful and considerate actions.
        When I was younger I would often chuckle at retired couples, because the wives sometimes complained that their husbands were irritating, being under foot all day.  Now that I've reached that same status I can better understand the difficulties of having a spouse around 24/7.  However, I frequently notice little things that have been done, and I know I wasn't the one who did them.  Is it so impossible to express appreciation for those acts of kindness and let the other stuff go?
        Many people take care of aging parents.  In my book, that's probably the ultimate expression of appreciation to the one (or ones) who spent countless hours preparing us for life.  My sister and her husband provided this service for my mother during her final years.  Did my brothers and sisters and I adequately express our appreciation to Toni and Paul for all they gave--and all they gave up--to provide Mom with a safe and loving environment?  I hope so, because their service was an incomparable act of gratitude to our mother who worked so hard to raise us.
        All around us, parents take care of sickly children, children take care of infirm parents, spouses take care of chronically or terminally ill spouses. In most cases this service is given with gentle thoughtfulness and concern--expressions not just of love but of deep appreciation for what the ailing loved one has given to our own life. 
         I asked my friend Lisa for permission to share her story.  She and her husband Quinn are taking care of Lisa's dad who has cancer.  A couple of days ago she posted this on her Facebook page:

Stupid cancer . . . Some of us want a new car . . . A new cell phone.. . To lose weight . . . But someone battling cancer wants just one thing, to win that battle. 97% of my friends won't re-post this, but 3% will. Let's see who does. Please re-post this in honor of someone who lost their battle, or for someone fighting it now.♥
GO DAD! You can lick this!

         Lisa probably has no idea how far-reaching her service to her father is.  It is so multifaceted.  She has not only welcomed him into her home, she is providing all the care that love can afford, seeing that his needs are met, and rooting for him as he fights to beat his disease.  She is also reaching out, beyond herself, to be concerned for those who are in a similar situation.  She seems to know what is really important in life: love, relationships, and service. Knowing Lisa, this doesn't surprise me.  She is the kind of person who consistently looks outside herself, seeking ways to assist others, not just in her family, but in her church and community as well.  However, as a caregiver myself, I know how wearing it can be--that constant concern for the health of a loved one.  So, I deeply appreciate her example of giving so diligently and completely.
         I share Lisa's story not to make anyone feel guilty, but because it is such a clear example of what love and gratitude can provide for someone in need.  We all have our own individual circumstances and capacities, and not all of us can or will give in the same ways.  However, within the realm of love and gratitude, we can each set aside the complacency of taking family for granted.  We can each find avenues for showing those closest to us how special they are, and how much we appreciate them in our lives. 
         Gratitude for family is probably the most difficult kind of gratitude we will ever express--let's face it, family can sometimes be abrasive and demanding. However, no where else will our efforts bear more important and productive fruit, because, really, family is everything.  And not in the way that Robert Frost expressed: "Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."  No, the most deep and abiding ties in family relationships go way beyond "have to". Those ties are strengthened and made fast by expressions of sincere appreciation, manifest through acts of kindness, service and unwavering love.

TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:
To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven.    Johannes Gaertner
          




        
           

The Negative Energy Drain

         We've all experienced leaky drains that let water out of the sink or tub very slowly when we don't want it to drain out at all.  SLOWLY,  SLOWLY the leak takes all that water away and leaves us, sitting naked, in a cold, uncomfortable place.  Negative energy can do the same thing.  Knowing that, why do we allow ourselves to hang out with a negative attitude?
         According to research, it is the natural disposition of human beings to gravitate toward negative thinking.  For some reason, it is just an easier path for us to take and requires a whole lot less effort than thinking positively.   So, next time you run across someone who is negative, just realize they are only being human.  Unfortunately, when we give in to that "easy", human road it ends up costing us big time, creating more stress and unhappiness.  When we filter everything through the lens of disappointment and discouragement we end up in a very bad place.  Just as though we were sitting in that tub with the leaky drain, eventually, we are left feeling cold and miserable.  
         How much more productive to give life the effort and persistence that will lead to greater satisfaction.  And--given enough repetition--greater joy in this human experience.  But it does take our effort.  However, not all effort is back breaking.  Sometimes "effort" simply means taking a moment to switch gears, to alter our focus. In fact, that effort can lead to a wholesome respite from the heavy load of our everyday responsibilities.  
         So, even if you have to set a timer to remind yourself, consider developing the habit of having regular "time outs" to step away from the necessary tasks of life, and just for a few moments, allow your awareness to be centered on something uplifting and joyful: the sound of laughter; music; a beautiful poem; the smell and taste of your food; gazing at the night sky; walking a woodland path; wading in a cold stream; picking wildflowers; holding some one's hand; the songs of birds, or the roll of thunder.  Everyone of these things requires us to exercise our awareness, to stop and take a moment away from the mundane things that require our attention.  And everyone of them can be like flipping a switch that turns on a light, helping us to see so clearly a blessing for which we can be grateful.  That recognition, in turn, alters our thinking and our feelings and brings happiness to life.  It can, in fact, be a truly transforming encounter if we allow ourselves to become immersed in the experience of it, if only for a few minutes.  To me, that's better than an antidepressant, a cup of coffee or a stiff drink, and a whole lot better for our health.
         Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."  So, instead of giving way to the easy road of negativity, consider the joy you will feel as you make your own personal trail, filled with moments--just simple moments--of heart lifting joy. That very personal path will lead to greater health and peace, and places of enlightenment and gratitude you've never imagined!

Note:  I believe my daughter-in-law, Kate, fixed the problem with the Comments section, and you can now post a comment if you would like.  I'd love to hear from you!
THANKS, KATE!

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING: 
Friends brought us fresh Swiss chard, beet greens and herbs from their garden.  I blanched the greens and put them in the freezer and dried some of the herbs, others I used fresh.  YUM!
Thank you, friends.  That's a blessing we get to enjoy now, and during the winter months!  And your friendship, well, that's a forever thing!

Energy and Persistence

           Two weeks ago my posts focused on ideas for relaxation.  Why?  Because I wanted you to experience the sense of renewal and peace that come as we clear our minds, relax our bodies, and center our hearts on all there is to be grateful for.  In additon, it is just plain healthy to allow our minds and bodies to rest from time to time. 
         However, most of the necessities of life aren't attended to while we're in a state of relaxation. There is a scientific law called entropy.  Simply stated, it teaches us that closed systems tend toward disorder unless acted upon by energy from an outside force (just think about what happens to your home when you don't pick things up for a day or two).  Benjamin Franklin told us that "energy and persistence alter all things."  In other words, it is only through work and consistent effort that our lives are saved from disorder.
         When my husband became ill eleven years ago my whole life changed.  I had always worked at home and in my church and community.  Suddenly, it was time to switch my focus and become employed for money away from home.  Until this past fall I was blessed to work in the natural health field, and I worked hard.  All that effort kept the bills paid and food on the table.  Now that my husband's Parkinson's disease has progressed to where he needs someone to be with him, I am at home again--still working hard.  My focus is most often on him and his needs.
         As I look back on all these years I feel enormously blessed that I have had the health, strength and intellect to do what I've needed to do to "keep it all together."  And in this mix of effort and emotion called life, I can't discount for one moment the blessings others have sent my way.  
         Sometimes people comment that they don't know how I do what I do.  They remark that my life must be discouraging.  After all, I've worked in natural health for years, yet nothing in traditional western or holistic medicine has helped my husband in a way that has made him healthy again.  True, it is difficult for us to travel, there are lots of doctor visits and tests, I'm always "on guard" watching for signs of low blood pressure or any indication that he is having trouble with balance and coordination, and let's face it, life isn't what anyone would consider "normal".  And no doubt about it, we aren't doing many of the things people our age usually get to do--wrapping up careers; traveling; pursuing hobbies, serving as community volunteers.  I can only say, I choose not to focus on those things. It would drive me crazy if I did.  Though, being human, I do have my moments of wondering what life would be like without Parkinson's disease in the picture.  However, I feel blessed to know that what I am doing is important. Although nothing has made an appreciable difference in Lynn's health, the path we have traveled has been an important and productive one.  For we are learning many lessons that, apparently, we are intended to learn.
     The French philosopher, Pierre Teihard De Chardin said, "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.  We are spiritual beings having a human experience."  I truly believe that all our experiences can draw us closer to our divine source, and make us more spiritually refined, emotionally resilient and compassionate, if we exert energy and persistence in looking for the good in our situation.
         As we have moved along through our experience, health, energy, the ability to persist, and blessings from loved ones and friends have all been given to me as needed.  I hope I never take any of these gifts for granted, because they are GIFTS--beautiful gifts wrapped in love and the desire to help us through a difficult situation--gifts that allow me to do what I need to do right now.  What would my life be like without them?  I don't even want to imagine!


TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
Exert energy and persistence to focus on what you have, not on what you have not.


 

Spread Sunshine

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
        
         I encouraged you, in Monday's post, to let your light shine as you go about your activities in the community, at school and at work.  Please don't feel overburdened by this suggestion.  Gratitude and happiness are such wonderful attributes to scatter around and share, and their expressions are so easily conveyed.  Like golden sunshine, they make all of life a whole lot brighter! 

        Here are 10 suggestions for making your community a happier place:

• Hold a door open for someone.   
• Smile and say "hello" to a stranger.
• Pick up trash along a roadside to make the world more attractive for others who pass by the same route.  Sometimes you will notice signs along a road or highway noting an organization or family who has volunteered to keep that stretch of road litter free.  Give silent thanks for their efforts.
• Don't take work relationships for granted.  Thank a co-worker for his assistance on a project.  Not only will it brighten his day, it will make for a more productive and happy work environment.
• Help an elderly person, or someone with kids, put his/her groceries in the car. 
• Take a few items from the pantry shelf and drop them off at a local food bank or collection site.  Many small contributions add up and make a big difference for families who are struggling.
• Visit an elderly resident of a nursing home.  Sing songs, ask about his/her childhood, greatest adventure, schooling or work life.  It will give hours of happiness to someone who may be very lonely. 
• Spontaneously join a neighbor and help out as they weed a vegetable garden or flower bed.
• Write a note to your pastor, bishop, or other religious leader and let him/her know how much you appreciated the message at this week's worship service.
• Invite a new family in your neighborhood to dinner.

         There are so many ways to express love and appreciation as we go about our daily routines, or take advantage of special opportunities.  Simple as they are, they really do make a difference to those who are touched by our thoughtfulness.
         I hope your week has been, and continues to be, an especially blessed one as you look for ways to uplift others.  It's amazing how happy the world can become as we serve one another in simple ways, just one little act at a time. 


TODAY'S INSPIRING QUOTATION:
"If you light a lamp for somebody, it will also brighten your path."  Buddhist saying.

Home Grown Gratitude

         I've encouraged you to spread your gratitude this week through a happy spirit.  Certainly there are many things each of us can do to make the journey through life just a little more cheerful.  Since I've given that encouragement, I don't suppose it would be inappropriate to share a few of my favorite ways of accomplishing that, and I think that home is a really good place to start.
         Home is the place we cherish most.  As the late America religious leader, Gordon B. Hinckley once said, "The storms stop at the door."  Home should be a haven, a peaceful refuge from the rest of the world.
True, it often falls short of that when kids are being kids (i.e.noisy and rambunctious), tempers flare, and patience seems hard to come by.  We all have those moments or those days.  However, as flawed and human as we are, home can still be our best and most favored place as we make the effort to share our lives in an atmosphere of gratitude and love. So, today I thought I'd share a few thoughts about how to do that.  Here are 10 simple ideas:

• Make the bed for a family member who was in a hurry this morning.  If you have time, leave a note.  Something simple like:  "The bed making fairy was here." 
• Talk to your child about the day he or she was born and the excitement you felt with his arrival.
• Put the children to bed early (or leave them with a neighbor) and make your husband a candlelight dinner.  Keep the conversation positive and focused on what's important to him.
• Fix your wife breakfast and bring it to her in bed.  Discuss her plans for the day.
• Ask your spouse or child what his/her most cherished dream is.  Consider how you can help it come true.
• Find a jar, decorate it, and place some positive words inside, each on a seperate slip of paper:  happy; smile; thanks; fortunate; beautiful; capable; friendly; appreciated;  peaceful; nurturing; accomplished; abundant, etc.  Remove one word each day and use it in your conversations.
• Have a special family night where everyone is given the opportunity to express one thing they admire about each family member.  No one is allowed to repeat what someone else has said. Sit in a circle and let everyone take a turn.  When our children were growing up we did this once or twice a year. 
• Read bedtime stories instead of watching television.
• Work side by side with your child doing the after-dinner cleanup.  Talk about your child's day, or take time to express some things you notice and admire about him/her. 
• Have a one-on-one ice cream date with a child or your spouse.

         I'm sure you also have great ideas for enhancing the spirit of gratitude, love, and happiness in your home.  I'd appreciate being able to share them with other readers of this blog.  So, please post them in the "Comments" section. 
         If you have trouble doing that (several people have told me this has been a problem), I think if you set up a g-mail account, posting a comment will be easy.  G-mail accounts are simple to create.  Just type in: sign up for g-mail in the Google search bar, click on their site and follow the instructions.  Then go back to the Comments section, type in your comment, then in the drop down box next to Comment as:  click Google Account. Then click on Post Comment.

Thanks, and have a wonderful day!

NOTE:  I've heard that you are still having trouble posting comments.  Not being tech savvy, I don't know what direction to give to clear up this problem, but I will be searching for an answer.  My apologies.  I really was eager to hear your ideas!


TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:
I hadn't been feeling well and my grandchildren came by with homemade get well cards. They also brought flowers they cut out of paper, colored, and scented with perfume.  Now that would make anyone feel better! 
      

The Influence of HAPPY!

         I know I'm a little late this morning, but I've been pondering how really blessed I am.  Makes me want to bless others!!
         I think it's great that weeks have new beginnings.  They're a time to consider just how we're going to spend the next seven days, and all the great things we can do to add a little uplift to the world. 
         We are, in many ways, SO POWERFUL because we get to choose how we will respond to life, and what we will give to those around us.  Whether it's in our family, with our spouse and children, in a work setting or out in the community, we get to choose what we will give and how we will relate to others.  That means we have influence--for good or bad.
         What kind of influence will we be this week?   What will we bring to the world?   How will our actions affect others?   Will they stimulate feelings of gratitude, joy, and peace?  I hope so, because what we do really does matter.  Studies show that focused, sincere expressions of love and concern boost immune function.  Conversely, negative emotions (fear, anger, frustration, jealousy, etc.) can suppress our immune system for up to six hours--and that's from just a 5-minute negative encounter (see http://www.heartmath.org/research/science-of-the-heart/emotional-balance-health.html).  OUCH!  Is it any wonder that negative emotions make us sick?          
         So, today, I'd like to encourage us to consider how we can express gratitude and love during this week: the next 7 beautiful days laying out there in front of us.  How will we fill them with our influence?  What will we give at work, at home, at school, in our interactions at the grocery store, doctor's office, church?  We'll be in a hundred different situations this week--that's a hundred opportunities to show love, express appreciation and bring some happiness into the world.  WOW!  A new week truly is a wonderful thing!!

TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT: 

Make Someone Happy.  Make Just One Someone Happy, and You Will Be Happy, Too!
                                                           (from  the musical Do, Re, Mi by Jule Styne, lyrics by Betty Comden and Adolph Green).
       

Relaxation Techniques--Part 3, Sacred Space

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         FINDING YOUR SACRED SPACE

A quiet garden can be the perfect setting for a "sacred space".

         What is a sacred space?  When I was little my sacred space was a place in the woods where I felt safe, and could silently watch dragon flies skimming close to the surface of a little pool.  I would sit for long periods of time and listen to the water trickling along the brook, smell wild fern and molding leaves, and marvel at the beauty of the purple wood geraniums.  No one bothered me. I could think and be at peace.
         When I got older my sacred space was a stretch of beach, away from the crowds of sun bathers and swimmers.  As I walked along I could look out to sea, all the way to the horizon.  I could hear the pounding breakers and screeching gulls, feel the salt spray, and deeply inhale the briny fragrance of the ocean.  In additon to the wonderful sensory experience, I was free to ponder.
         As an adult living in Connecticut, my sacred space was my bedroom.  It was large with beautiful curtains, soothing colors, many windows, and paintings that invited a feeling of relaxation.  As soon as I closed the door I could feel an instant release and calm.  There I could pray and meditate. 

         Now I live in a much smaller home and my sacred space is often outdoors again, where I can hear water cascading over rock and feel the coolness of the canyon air.  Sometimes it is on the back porch late at night, beneath a sky filled with stars.  Not infrequently, my sacred space is also indoors, in a holy temple where I can focus on the things of God.  In each of these places there is a quietness that invites a connection to divine influence.

         Where do you feel calm and at peace, have time to contemplate and let go of your everyday cares, feel silence and rest for your soul?  Wherever it is, this is your sacred space.  It may change from time to time depending on your circumstances, but if you wish to be whole and find joy, a sacred space will bless your life.  For this is a place where you can be alone;  where you can commune with the divine. 

         Life is bigger than any of us, and we are all connected to that source who created us and all of nature around us.  In the bustle of life we become focused on the necessities of providing for ourselves and our families. We seek refuge in entertainment.  We sit at computers, in front of televisions, in crowded stadiums and in long lines of traffic.  We become DISconnected from our source.  Visiting our sacred space is a way of reconnecting to who we really are and sensing the divine within. We are so much bigger and better than the mere THINGS with which we surround ourselves.  Yes, those things may be necessary, even fun and relaxing.  They often help us make contact more readily with other people and information.  However, those people, things and information are not our source.  They are not the divine origin from which we came. 

         You will find, as you select and go to a place that is sacred to you--as you spend regular time there--you will feel more calm and centered.  You will better know who you are and what you want for your life. 
         Once you have found your sacred space, guard it.  It is your personal sanctuary and your opportunity to be still; to feel the presence of a power greater than yourself.  In your sacred space, as you ponder and commune with the Creator, you come to know you are not alone.  You come to know peace and respite.  You come to know God.

TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:

"The beach was my synagogue and the waves and gulls were audience to my prayers.  I stood on the beach and felt wind-blown sprays of ocean on my face, and I prayed." 

(Asher Lev,  in My Name is Asher Lev,  by Chaim Potok, Anchor Books, NY, 1972)