The Goodness That is YOU

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         Someone asked me the other day if I was feeling a little sentimental.  I replied, "No, I don't think so."  Then he referenced my blogs from earlier this week.  I laughed.  Guess I got caught strolling down memory lane.  But there's nothing wrong with a little exercise that brings you back into contact with the great people and experiences you've known.  However, to spare you from my nostalgia, I will address a different kind of topic today--the blessing of being POSITIVE.
         I've commented more than once that there is so much good in the world that it isn't difficult to find many reasons for being grateful.  But what about the good IN YOU, that goodness that IS YOU?  I sometimes think, if we could just understand how really awesome we are, we would be absolutely EXCITED about life and about all our possibilities for affecting the world around us in marvelous ways.  I don't mean that in a "Look at me.  Look how wonderful I am" way.  In fact, the very thought of how special we are is extremely humbling.
         We all came from God.  Having come from our great Creator, we also contain a bit of divinity.  Though much of that divine light may be dimmed by this moral life, that light is still within us, and we can, given enough thought and effort, access it.  But how do we do that?
          My formula:

• First, believe in the goodness that is you.  Believe that you are a bit of divinity, placed here upon this earth to do good and to be an influence that uplifts and helps others.  Believe that humbly and with thanksgiving.
• Second, spend a little time each day just sitting quietly and letting that belief sink into your soul. Ponder what it means and how you can use it for good.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone."  You must take time to be still and listen for the quiet whisperings of the Spirit--the spirit of God speaking to that bit of divinity within you.  
• Third, choose a quotation, scripture, or inspired thought that you can easily memorize that sums up that belief.  Here are a few suggestions, but any positive message will do if it reminds you that you are capable and of value:

If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.  Thomas Edison

What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man that thou visitest him?  For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour."  (Psalms 8:4-5  KJV)

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.  Vincent Van Gogh

Prepare your mind to receive the best that life has to offer.  Ernest Holmes

• Forth and last, go out and DO.  Act upon the belief that you have an important purpose in life and the power to accomplish that purpose.

         If that all seems a little heady or too "out there", believe me, there is absolutely nothing wrong with putting a positive spin on life.  There are certainly enough negative messages in the world.  Contemplating the goodness within ourselves, and the goodness we can achieve, will help to counter those messages.  Whether our purpose is to be the best parent, the best doctor, the best grocery store clerk or the best friend we can be, each of us can go about the world spreading the light of kindness and genuine concern for others.  
         We are extraordinary and unique, you and I.  We have the potential to bless the world in so many enriching and wonderful ways. We each have great capabilities and the power to achieve much good.  Wouldn't it be incredible if, together, we caused the light of that belief to shine so brilliantly that even those who doubt their value could begin to see it clearly? 


TODAY'S INSPIRING QUOTATION:  There is a basic law that like attracts like. Negative thinking definitely attracts negative results. Conversely, if a person habitually thinks optimistically and hopefully, his positive thinking sets in motion creative forces -- and success instead of eluding him flows toward him.    Norman Vincent Peale

Gratitude and Work

   
          Now that I've joined the Facebook generation, I've found myself wondering what will happen to my waistline.  Facebook, e-mail, researching information on the computer, that's a lot of time SITTING, and less time doing physical things.  It doesn't mean I'm not working--the computer has become an important work tool for me.  It does mean that my work has taken on a different hue.  One with which  I'm not yet completely comfortable.  I am, after all, from a different generation.
           One thing I noticed, as I was growing up, was the incredible work ethic of my grandparents.  Both sets of grandparents were always busy providing for the needs of their families, and that meant physical labor, and a lot of it!  Although they napped for a while each afternoon, in the hours before and after their rest they were working.  As a child, I watched my Grandpa Durfee and his sons build a house they would later sell to help provide for family needs.  I saw them helping one another, and helping my mom complete the construction of our home after my father died. 
         My dad's parents were Italian and they had a huge garden, a vineyard, orchard, and chestnut trees.  My grandpa and uncles were forever clearing away brush, weeding, pruning, planting and picking.  That was in addition to my uncles' regular employment away from home. 
         My aunts were busy cooking meals, doing laundry, tending children, encouraging civility and enterprise, and dispensing love in generally large doses.  My own mother did those things, as well.  When I was in Junior High School she returned to school to earn her degree as a licensed practical nurse.  She would later earn degrees as a registered nurse and a nurse practitioner. 
         I don't remember people sitting around too often with time on their hands.  However, there were periods of rest and recreation--playing bocce ball on the lawn, or watching a Saturday afternoon Red Sox or Yankees game on television at the Norcia farm.  And sometimes we'd go out to Sandy Point on the boat owned by my mom's brothers.  There we could spend a few hours picnicking and swimming.  We also had cousins and friends to play with.  However, these were generally "earned" privileges that came after our homework and chores were completed.  And we did have chores!  There was gardening to do, house cleaning, and tending the chickens.  Some of us had newspaper routes after school and on weekends.  As an additional part of our weekly routine, we were also expected to take our turns helping with the laundry and ironing, and with dinner preparations and clean up. 
          If all that sounds a little overwhelming, it wasn't.  It was the way life was, and it was healthy.  There were no computers, let alone computer games.  We had a party line with two neighboring families and often had to "wait our turn" to use the phone.  There were no 2 or 3 hour phone conversations with friends, and no begging for a phone of our own.  We asked before we plopped down on the living room rug to relax in front of a television show because watching T.V. was the exception.
         The other thing I remember about my grandparents, aunts and uncles, were their frequent expressions of gratitude for all they had. My Italian grandparents had moved to the United States to live and work in a Massachusetts mill town, just for the opportunity to have a better life than they had known in "the old country".   It wasn't until years later, with the help of an uncle, that they bought a small farm in rural Connecticut.  All the relatives in the generation before mine lived through a severe depression in this country.  They knew what "hungry" felt like, because they sometimes went to bed having eaten little or nothing.  They knew what moldy flour tasted like, because sometimes it was the only flour they had.  They knew the exhilaration of watching their gardens grow because they had taken the time to plant and tend them, but they knew more than that.  They were aware that sometimes all the planting and tending and watchful care in the world could come to nothing, because sometimes the earth did not produce if there was to much rain, or too little rain, or disease. Knowing how capricious nature can be, and how hard food was to come by, even from the grocer, they also knew a dependence upon God, and gratitude to their Creator for providing for their needs.  They knew that body aches and fatigue, even in productive years, were necessary to make the earth yield a harvest.  They knew the exertion required to catch a fine "haul" of fish.  And they knew that the after effects of sore muscles and aching joints were a whole lot better than the feeling of hungry.  
         Hard work, back then, was usually productive work.  I remember the joy on my Grandmother Durfee's face as she picked a bouquet of flowers she had grown in her yard, and my Grandpa Norcia proudly displaying the chicken eggs he had gathered from the coop and placed in his brimmed hat.  I remember my mother beaming with pleasure at the jars of canned beans, peaches, jams and soups she had "put up"; not to mention the freezer filled with produce she had blanched and packed away in plastic freezer boxes. I also remember the excitement as she earned her diploma in nursing.
         Am I stuck on living in the past?  I don't think so.  However, I am stuck on remembering that there used to be a physical component to life that was much more prevalent than it is today.  Sitting at the computer or playing with your cell phone seems, to me, to lead to more sedentary preoccupations, like games and texting--even while driving!  I simply fear that we will forget some really important things like: there are people to talk to--face to face; eyes to look in to, to see the sparkle of pride, or joy, or satisfaction reflected there; people to be listened to--really listened to--not just in passing, but with our full attention.  And even though the world has changed in many respects, there are still bodies that benefit from the pain of exertion and a little sweat pouring down the back during an afternoon of gardening, or building, or helping a friend in need; and minds that can be plied to think in new directions and learn new things.
         Yes, I am looking back a bit, but only because there is something to be learned there: hard work, whether mental or physical, feels great, and along with that feeling of satisfaction is the feeling of gratitude--gratitude that you CAN work; gratitude that your labors are productive; gratitude that what you have produced is blessing your family, and gratitude to God, from whom all blessing flow. Gratitude and hard work are twin attributes.  Working hard makes you grateful that you have the capacity to work, and that it produces fruit; and the fruit of your labor produces gratitude that your work has not been in vain.

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:  Thanks to Facebook and e-mail I made contact this week with 3 friends from my younger years.  We hadn't talked in such a long time!  So, you see, I'm not anti-technology.  I just have a great appreciation for focused, productive work.

School's Open

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.


West Broad Street Elementary School
Where It All Started For Me
Education, Friendships, Social Interaction



         For millions of kids across the USA this is the week that begins their new school year.  For millions more it will begin just after Labor Day.  How lucky are they?  I know that my sister in Florida has been busy for weeks preparing for her elementary school class.  I'm sure her head is spinning with ideas, and those kids are darn lucky to have Mrs. Simpler for their teacher. I wonder if they understand their good fortune.

         When I think of the kids in many African nations and other places around the world who would give anything for a pencil and pad of paper, or for the opportunity to have a school nearby, I have to wonder if, in this country, we know how really blessed we are.  I used to moan and groan about the end of summer, and dread the impending piles of homework.  I know I was one who probably took a good education for granted.  As I look back, I remember many wonderful teachers:  Mrs. Hustlebee in first grade;  Mrs. Blake in 5th;  Mr. Kravanek, Mrs. Fabricant and Mr. Pouliot in Junior High, and Mrs. Ostigny, Miss Silverstein, and Mrs. Nardone in High School.  There were many others, but those are the ones who stand out in my mind because they seemed to really care, not just about my education, but about helping me to be my best as an individual.
         And who can forget the friendships?  I hope Christine Murano has forgiven me for biting her in 1st grade--that was MY piece of puzzle, Christine!--Barbara, Suzanne, Linda, Judy, Mary, Tony, Mac and so many others. Do you remember buying comic books at Shea's, the class trip to Mystic Seaport, school dances, our high school performance of Strange Borders?
         I was a pretty shy kid, but not so withdrawn that I didn't notice I was surrounded by a lot of wonderful people, some who were friends from first grade through high school.  School provides that for us--a safe transition from the shelter of home into the larger world.  A way to begin spreading our wings, forming trusted relationships, discovering our abilities and, eventually, learning to fly.
         Reading, math, science and all the other subjects are, without a doubt, important.  However, school also provides a great laboratory for experimenting with getting along in the world:  practicing proper social conduct; learning sportsmanship; becoming a responsible member of the community. And in the midst of all that, we are blessed to learn self discipline, self confidence and self respect.
         So, as this school year begins, and you send those wee ones, and bigger ones, out the door, don't just breathe a sigh of relief that summer is over.  Take a moment to remember your own experiences with school, and all the wonderful people you knew, and possibly still know from those formative years.  How blessed we are that school, at its best, isn't just an institution for book learning.  It really is a place for learning about LIFE !


TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
CONSIDER CONTACTING A FRIEND FROM YOUR PAST IN SCHOOL TO THANK HIM OR HER FOR THE GREAT MEMORIES!

Living Gratitude

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

        Sometimes those closest to us are the most difficult to appreciate.  Why? Probably because, being who they are, they do nice things for us frequently and we sometimes take their thoughtfulness for granted.  It's also not UNlikely that they do things that irritate us and, we, being who we are (human), may focus on those annoyances rather than their helpful and considerate actions.
        When I was younger I would often chuckle at retired couples, because the wives sometimes complained that their husbands were irritating, being under foot all day.  Now that I've reached that same status I can better understand the difficulties of having a spouse around 24/7.  However, I frequently notice little things that have been done, and I know I wasn't the one who did them.  Is it so impossible to express appreciation for those acts of kindness and let the other stuff go?
        Many people take care of aging parents.  In my book, that's probably the ultimate expression of appreciation to the one (or ones) who spent countless hours preparing us for life.  My sister and her husband provided this service for my mother during her final years.  Did my brothers and sisters and I adequately express our appreciation to Toni and Paul for all they gave--and all they gave up--to provide Mom with a safe and loving environment?  I hope so, because their service was an incomparable act of gratitude to our mother who worked so hard to raise us.
        All around us, parents take care of sickly children, children take care of infirm parents, spouses take care of chronically or terminally ill spouses. In most cases this service is given with gentle thoughtfulness and concern--expressions not just of love but of deep appreciation for what the ailing loved one has given to our own life. 
         I asked my friend Lisa for permission to share her story.  She and her husband Quinn are taking care of Lisa's dad who has cancer.  A couple of days ago she posted this on her Facebook page:

Stupid cancer . . . Some of us want a new car . . . A new cell phone.. . To lose weight . . . But someone battling cancer wants just one thing, to win that battle. 97% of my friends won't re-post this, but 3% will. Let's see who does. Please re-post this in honor of someone who lost their battle, or for someone fighting it now.♥
GO DAD! You can lick this!

         Lisa probably has no idea how far-reaching her service to her father is.  It is so multifaceted.  She has not only welcomed him into her home, she is providing all the care that love can afford, seeing that his needs are met, and rooting for him as he fights to beat his disease.  She is also reaching out, beyond herself, to be concerned for those who are in a similar situation.  She seems to know what is really important in life: love, relationships, and service. Knowing Lisa, this doesn't surprise me.  She is the kind of person who consistently looks outside herself, seeking ways to assist others, not just in her family, but in her church and community as well.  However, as a caregiver myself, I know how wearing it can be--that constant concern for the health of a loved one.  So, I deeply appreciate her example of giving so diligently and completely.
         I share Lisa's story not to make anyone feel guilty, but because it is such a clear example of what love and gratitude can provide for someone in need.  We all have our own individual circumstances and capacities, and not all of us can or will give in the same ways.  However, within the realm of love and gratitude, we can each set aside the complacency of taking family for granted.  We can each find avenues for showing those closest to us how special they are, and how much we appreciate them in our lives. 
         Gratitude for family is probably the most difficult kind of gratitude we will ever express--let's face it, family can sometimes be abrasive and demanding. However, no where else will our efforts bear more important and productive fruit, because, really, family is everything.  And not in the way that Robert Frost expressed: "Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."  No, the most deep and abiding ties in family relationships go way beyond "have to". Those ties are strengthened and made fast by expressions of sincere appreciation, manifest through acts of kindness, service and unwavering love.

TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:
To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven.    Johannes Gaertner
          




        
           

The Negative Energy Drain

         We've all experienced leaky drains that let water out of the sink or tub very slowly when we don't want it to drain out at all.  SLOWLY,  SLOWLY the leak takes all that water away and leaves us, sitting naked, in a cold, uncomfortable place.  Negative energy can do the same thing.  Knowing that, why do we allow ourselves to hang out with a negative attitude?
         According to research, it is the natural disposition of human beings to gravitate toward negative thinking.  For some reason, it is just an easier path for us to take and requires a whole lot less effort than thinking positively.   So, next time you run across someone who is negative, just realize they are only being human.  Unfortunately, when we give in to that "easy", human road it ends up costing us big time, creating more stress and unhappiness.  When we filter everything through the lens of disappointment and discouragement we end up in a very bad place.  Just as though we were sitting in that tub with the leaky drain, eventually, we are left feeling cold and miserable.  
         How much more productive to give life the effort and persistence that will lead to greater satisfaction.  And--given enough repetition--greater joy in this human experience.  But it does take our effort.  However, not all effort is back breaking.  Sometimes "effort" simply means taking a moment to switch gears, to alter our focus. In fact, that effort can lead to a wholesome respite from the heavy load of our everyday responsibilities.  
         So, even if you have to set a timer to remind yourself, consider developing the habit of having regular "time outs" to step away from the necessary tasks of life, and just for a few moments, allow your awareness to be centered on something uplifting and joyful: the sound of laughter; music; a beautiful poem; the smell and taste of your food; gazing at the night sky; walking a woodland path; wading in a cold stream; picking wildflowers; holding some one's hand; the songs of birds, or the roll of thunder.  Everyone of these things requires us to exercise our awareness, to stop and take a moment away from the mundane things that require our attention.  And everyone of them can be like flipping a switch that turns on a light, helping us to see so clearly a blessing for which we can be grateful.  That recognition, in turn, alters our thinking and our feelings and brings happiness to life.  It can, in fact, be a truly transforming encounter if we allow ourselves to become immersed in the experience of it, if only for a few minutes.  To me, that's better than an antidepressant, a cup of coffee or a stiff drink, and a whole lot better for our health.
         Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."  So, instead of giving way to the easy road of negativity, consider the joy you will feel as you make your own personal trail, filled with moments--just simple moments--of heart lifting joy. That very personal path will lead to greater health and peace, and places of enlightenment and gratitude you've never imagined!

Note:  I believe my daughter-in-law, Kate, fixed the problem with the Comments section, and you can now post a comment if you would like.  I'd love to hear from you!
THANKS, KATE!

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING: 
Friends brought us fresh Swiss chard, beet greens and herbs from their garden.  I blanched the greens and put them in the freezer and dried some of the herbs, others I used fresh.  YUM!
Thank you, friends.  That's a blessing we get to enjoy now, and during the winter months!  And your friendship, well, that's a forever thing!

Energy and Persistence

           Two weeks ago my posts focused on ideas for relaxation.  Why?  Because I wanted you to experience the sense of renewal and peace that come as we clear our minds, relax our bodies, and center our hearts on all there is to be grateful for.  In additon, it is just plain healthy to allow our minds and bodies to rest from time to time. 
         However, most of the necessities of life aren't attended to while we're in a state of relaxation. There is a scientific law called entropy.  Simply stated, it teaches us that closed systems tend toward disorder unless acted upon by energy from an outside force (just think about what happens to your home when you don't pick things up for a day or two).  Benjamin Franklin told us that "energy and persistence alter all things."  In other words, it is only through work and consistent effort that our lives are saved from disorder.
         When my husband became ill eleven years ago my whole life changed.  I had always worked at home and in my church and community.  Suddenly, it was time to switch my focus and become employed for money away from home.  Until this past fall I was blessed to work in the natural health field, and I worked hard.  All that effort kept the bills paid and food on the table.  Now that my husband's Parkinson's disease has progressed to where he needs someone to be with him, I am at home again--still working hard.  My focus is most often on him and his needs.
         As I look back on all these years I feel enormously blessed that I have had the health, strength and intellect to do what I've needed to do to "keep it all together."  And in this mix of effort and emotion called life, I can't discount for one moment the blessings others have sent my way.  
         Sometimes people comment that they don't know how I do what I do.  They remark that my life must be discouraging.  After all, I've worked in natural health for years, yet nothing in traditional western or holistic medicine has helped my husband in a way that has made him healthy again.  True, it is difficult for us to travel, there are lots of doctor visits and tests, I'm always "on guard" watching for signs of low blood pressure or any indication that he is having trouble with balance and coordination, and let's face it, life isn't what anyone would consider "normal".  And no doubt about it, we aren't doing many of the things people our age usually get to do--wrapping up careers; traveling; pursuing hobbies, serving as community volunteers.  I can only say, I choose not to focus on those things. It would drive me crazy if I did.  Though, being human, I do have my moments of wondering what life would be like without Parkinson's disease in the picture.  However, I feel blessed to know that what I am doing is important. Although nothing has made an appreciable difference in Lynn's health, the path we have traveled has been an important and productive one.  For we are learning many lessons that, apparently, we are intended to learn.
     The French philosopher, Pierre Teihard De Chardin said, "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.  We are spiritual beings having a human experience."  I truly believe that all our experiences can draw us closer to our divine source, and make us more spiritually refined, emotionally resilient and compassionate, if we exert energy and persistence in looking for the good in our situation.
         As we have moved along through our experience, health, energy, the ability to persist, and blessings from loved ones and friends have all been given to me as needed.  I hope I never take any of these gifts for granted, because they are GIFTS--beautiful gifts wrapped in love and the desire to help us through a difficult situation--gifts that allow me to do what I need to do right now.  What would my life be like without them?  I don't even want to imagine!


TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
Exert energy and persistence to focus on what you have, not on what you have not.


 

Spread Sunshine

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
        
         I encouraged you, in Monday's post, to let your light shine as you go about your activities in the community, at school and at work.  Please don't feel overburdened by this suggestion.  Gratitude and happiness are such wonderful attributes to scatter around and share, and their expressions are so easily conveyed.  Like golden sunshine, they make all of life a whole lot brighter! 

        Here are 10 suggestions for making your community a happier place:

• Hold a door open for someone.   
• Smile and say "hello" to a stranger.
• Pick up trash along a roadside to make the world more attractive for others who pass by the same route.  Sometimes you will notice signs along a road or highway noting an organization or family who has volunteered to keep that stretch of road litter free.  Give silent thanks for their efforts.
• Don't take work relationships for granted.  Thank a co-worker for his assistance on a project.  Not only will it brighten his day, it will make for a more productive and happy work environment.
• Help an elderly person, or someone with kids, put his/her groceries in the car. 
• Take a few items from the pantry shelf and drop them off at a local food bank or collection site.  Many small contributions add up and make a big difference for families who are struggling.
• Visit an elderly resident of a nursing home.  Sing songs, ask about his/her childhood, greatest adventure, schooling or work life.  It will give hours of happiness to someone who may be very lonely. 
• Spontaneously join a neighbor and help out as they weed a vegetable garden or flower bed.
• Write a note to your pastor, bishop, or other religious leader and let him/her know how much you appreciated the message at this week's worship service.
• Invite a new family in your neighborhood to dinner.

         There are so many ways to express love and appreciation as we go about our daily routines, or take advantage of special opportunities.  Simple as they are, they really do make a difference to those who are touched by our thoughtfulness.
         I hope your week has been, and continues to be, an especially blessed one as you look for ways to uplift others.  It's amazing how happy the world can become as we serve one another in simple ways, just one little act at a time. 


TODAY'S INSPIRING QUOTATION:
"If you light a lamp for somebody, it will also brighten your path."  Buddhist saying.

Home Grown Gratitude

         I've encouraged you to spread your gratitude this week through a happy spirit.  Certainly there are many things each of us can do to make the journey through life just a little more cheerful.  Since I've given that encouragement, I don't suppose it would be inappropriate to share a few of my favorite ways of accomplishing that, and I think that home is a really good place to start.
         Home is the place we cherish most.  As the late America religious leader, Gordon B. Hinckley once said, "The storms stop at the door."  Home should be a haven, a peaceful refuge from the rest of the world.
True, it often falls short of that when kids are being kids (i.e.noisy and rambunctious), tempers flare, and patience seems hard to come by.  We all have those moments or those days.  However, as flawed and human as we are, home can still be our best and most favored place as we make the effort to share our lives in an atmosphere of gratitude and love. So, today I thought I'd share a few thoughts about how to do that.  Here are 10 simple ideas:

• Make the bed for a family member who was in a hurry this morning.  If you have time, leave a note.  Something simple like:  "The bed making fairy was here." 
• Talk to your child about the day he or she was born and the excitement you felt with his arrival.
• Put the children to bed early (or leave them with a neighbor) and make your husband a candlelight dinner.  Keep the conversation positive and focused on what's important to him.
• Fix your wife breakfast and bring it to her in bed.  Discuss her plans for the day.
• Ask your spouse or child what his/her most cherished dream is.  Consider how you can help it come true.
• Find a jar, decorate it, and place some positive words inside, each on a seperate slip of paper:  happy; smile; thanks; fortunate; beautiful; capable; friendly; appreciated;  peaceful; nurturing; accomplished; abundant, etc.  Remove one word each day and use it in your conversations.
• Have a special family night where everyone is given the opportunity to express one thing they admire about each family member.  No one is allowed to repeat what someone else has said. Sit in a circle and let everyone take a turn.  When our children were growing up we did this once or twice a year. 
• Read bedtime stories instead of watching television.
• Work side by side with your child doing the after-dinner cleanup.  Talk about your child's day, or take time to express some things you notice and admire about him/her. 
• Have a one-on-one ice cream date with a child or your spouse.

         I'm sure you also have great ideas for enhancing the spirit of gratitude, love, and happiness in your home.  I'd appreciate being able to share them with other readers of this blog.  So, please post them in the "Comments" section. 
         If you have trouble doing that (several people have told me this has been a problem), I think if you set up a g-mail account, posting a comment will be easy.  G-mail accounts are simple to create.  Just type in: sign up for g-mail in the Google search bar, click on their site and follow the instructions.  Then go back to the Comments section, type in your comment, then in the drop down box next to Comment as:  click Google Account. Then click on Post Comment.

Thanks, and have a wonderful day!

NOTE:  I've heard that you are still having trouble posting comments.  Not being tech savvy, I don't know what direction to give to clear up this problem, but I will be searching for an answer.  My apologies.  I really was eager to hear your ideas!


TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:
I hadn't been feeling well and my grandchildren came by with homemade get well cards. They also brought flowers they cut out of paper, colored, and scented with perfume.  Now that would make anyone feel better! 
      

The Influence of HAPPY!

         I know I'm a little late this morning, but I've been pondering how really blessed I am.  Makes me want to bless others!!
         I think it's great that weeks have new beginnings.  They're a time to consider just how we're going to spend the next seven days, and all the great things we can do to add a little uplift to the world. 
         We are, in many ways, SO POWERFUL because we get to choose how we will respond to life, and what we will give to those around us.  Whether it's in our family, with our spouse and children, in a work setting or out in the community, we get to choose what we will give and how we will relate to others.  That means we have influence--for good or bad.
         What kind of influence will we be this week?   What will we bring to the world?   How will our actions affect others?   Will they stimulate feelings of gratitude, joy, and peace?  I hope so, because what we do really does matter.  Studies show that focused, sincere expressions of love and concern boost immune function.  Conversely, negative emotions (fear, anger, frustration, jealousy, etc.) can suppress our immune system for up to six hours--and that's from just a 5-minute negative encounter (see http://www.heartmath.org/research/science-of-the-heart/emotional-balance-health.html).  OUCH!  Is it any wonder that negative emotions make us sick?          
         So, today, I'd like to encourage us to consider how we can express gratitude and love during this week: the next 7 beautiful days laying out there in front of us.  How will we fill them with our influence?  What will we give at work, at home, at school, in our interactions at the grocery store, doctor's office, church?  We'll be in a hundred different situations this week--that's a hundred opportunities to show love, express appreciation and bring some happiness into the world.  WOW!  A new week truly is a wonderful thing!!

TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT: 

Make Someone Happy.  Make Just One Someone Happy, and You Will Be Happy, Too!
                                                           (from  the musical Do, Re, Mi by Jule Styne, lyrics by Betty Comden and Adolph Green).
       

Relaxation Techniques--Part 3, Sacred Space

Reminder:  If you've been keeping a Gratitude Journal now is a good time to update it.  Who blessed your life this week?  What events lifted your heart?  What did you see, hear or read that inspired you?  There are so many reasons to be grateful!  

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         FINDING YOUR SACRED SPACE

A quiet garden can be the perfect setting for a "sacred space".

         What is a sacred space?  When I was little my sacred space was a place in the woods where I felt safe, and could silently watch dragon flies skimming close to the surface of a little pool.  I would sit for long periods of time and listen to the water trickling along the brook, smell wild fern and molding leaves, and marvel at the beauty of the purple wood geraniums.  No one bothered me. I could think and be at peace.
         When I got older my sacred space was a stretch of beach, away from the crowds of sun bathers and swimmers.  As I walked along I could look out to sea, all the way to the horizon.  I could hear the pounding breakers and screeching gulls, feel the salt spray, and deeply inhale the briny fragrance of the ocean.  In additon to the wonderful sensory experience, I was free to ponder.
         As an adult living in Connecticut, my sacred space was my bedroom.  It was large with beautiful curtains, soothing colors, many windows, and paintings that invited a feeling of relaxation.  As soon as I closed the door I could feel an instant release and calm.  There I could pray and meditate. 

         Now I live in a much smaller home and my sacred space is often outdoors again, where I can hear water cascading over rock and feel the coolness of the canyon air.  Sometimes it is on the back porch late at night, beneath a sky filled with stars.  Not infrequently, my sacred space is also indoors, in a holy temple where I can focus on the things of God.  In each of these places there is a quietness that invites a connection to divine influence.

         Where do you feel calm and at peace, have time to contemplate and let go of your everyday cares, feel silence and rest for your soul?  Wherever it is, this is your sacred space.  It may change from time to time depending on your circumstances, but if you wish to be whole and find joy, a sacred space will bless your life.  For this is a place where you can be alone;  where you can commune with the divine. 

         Life is bigger than any of us, and we are all connected to that source who created us and all of nature around us.  In the bustle of life we become focused on the necessities of providing for ourselves and our families. We seek refuge in entertainment.  We sit at computers, in front of televisions, in crowded stadiums and in long lines of traffic.  We become DISconnected from our source.  Visiting our sacred space is a way of reconnecting to who we really are and sensing the divine within. We are so much bigger and better than the mere THINGS with which we surround ourselves.  Yes, those things may be necessary, even fun and relaxing.  They often help us make contact more readily with other people and information.  However, those people, things and information are not our source.  They are not the divine origin from which we came. 

         You will find, as you select and go to a place that is sacred to you--as you spend regular time there--you will feel more calm and centered.  You will better know who you are and what you want for your life. 
         Once you have found your sacred space, guard it.  It is your personal sanctuary and your opportunity to be still; to feel the presence of a power greater than yourself.  In your sacred space, as you ponder and commune with the Creator, you come to know you are not alone.  You come to know peace and respite.  You come to know God.

TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:

"The beach was my synagogue and the waves and gulls were audience to my prayers.  I stood on the beach and felt wind-blown sprays of ocean on my face, and I prayed." 

(Asher Lev,  in My Name is Asher Lev,  by Chaim Potok, Anchor Books, NY, 1972)

Relaxation Techniques--Part 2, Visualization

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

Visualization

        As I promised, I am dedicating this week's posts to sharing some techniques that have helped me to relax and handle stress.  In today's offering, I would like to tackle those nasty emotions we all have from time to time:  bitterness, resentment, jealousy, anger....  You know what I mean.
        So, today let's do some visualization, and clear out those ugly beasties that sometimes rear their offensive heads and clutter our hearts and minds with negativity. A negative perspective can become consuming, blocking our ability to live productively. At best it is distracting and a waste of time and energy.  Besides, I don't believe any of us enjoys that discomforting and dark place where our thoughts are whirling with hurt and anger, not even for a moment.  It's a place disconnected from our best and happiest self and, honestly, we don't need to settle for that in our life.  There are better places to live!
        The following exercise is based on one from my book, Gratitude's Transcending Power.  It has helped me to let go of negative thoughts and feelings, and embrace the abundance that is available to me.  I'm confident that it can help you, too!
         
         Visualize yourself being transported to a very high mountain.  Standing on that mountain top, pull up from within yourself every negative thought or feeling--fear; doubt; envy; anxiety; everything that is demeaning or defeating--and cast if from you.  As you let go, currents of wind scoop up each bit of negativity, and every self-defeating and limiting behavior.  They're blown away, carried far from you, to distant places where you never have to go.
         Turn away.  Every negative influence is gone and you're free.  An empty vessel, you are ready to receive and be filled.  Open yourself, drawing into your being beauty, peace, and positive influence.  It comes in many forms:  uplifting music, encouraging friends who remind you of your value and ability; the beauties of nature; scripture passages; inspiring thoughts recorded in great literature; an image from a photograph or piece of art.  Contemplate just one of these positive and beautiful influences.  Allow the spirit of thanksgiving for this influence or object to fill your soul and expand your awareness of the vast array of goodness that is available to you.  Rejoice in this awareness, and know that you can revisit this mountain peak at any time to be renewed and strengthened.
        
          Take your time as you do this exercise and let its full impact rest on you. What are you seeing, hearing, smelling?  Especially, what are you feeling?  Along with whatever else you are experiencing, let yourself feel gratitude for the beautiful object, sound, smell, thought or scene you have focused on.  It is in deeply feeling your positive responses that beneficial chemicals are released into your system. These chemicals will actually lessen your stress and help you to relax and find joy in life.  Let go of any feelings of guilt, shame or embarrassment about the negative feelings you released in this exercise.  Those feelings may have been with you for a long time, but they are not your friends and they do not need to be your traveling companions.  Let them go and embrace beauty and peace.
         Do this exercise whenever you feel negative emotions boiling up inside.  Every time you do it you are stimulating your brain to produce new and more positive messages that do two very important things:  as stated above, they cause chemicals to be released that will help to calm you, and you will actually create new neuro pathways in your brain.  The more frequently you do the exercise the stronger these positive pathways will become, and you will find that you are able to more quickly and effectively cope with and let go of negative emotions in the future.  So, don't wait, begin now to develop more positive and healthy thoughts, and enjoy the blessings of life that keep you in a happy, productive place. 

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:
Today's awesome blessing actually happened Monday night.  My husband and I went out for the evening with friends and enjoyed a free concert at an outdoor amphitheater.  It had rained earlier in the day, but the evening was sunny and the temperature was perfect.  The music was lighthearted and fun, and there was plenty of opportunity for toe tapping and hand clapping.  Many of the songs were original compositions that were very personal to the performers, and I found myself marveling at their ability to put simple experiences to engaging tunes.  I thought to myself, "We need to do this more often.  What a wonderful way to relax!"




        
        

Relaxation Techniques---AAHHH!

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         Life can be stressful, especially as we wait for others to make decisions that will have a direct impact on our welfare.  So, if life has stressed you out, gotten you down and riled you up, this week's posts should be helpful.  They will all be addressing techniques to help you chill out and relax into a greater sense of gratitude.  All are at little or no cost.
         I know, we would all LOVE to go to the spa and be pampered for awhile.  Aahh, the bliss!  However, that isn't possible for everyone.  Nevertheless, there are some ways you can gratefully settle into a sense of release.  Today's post will discuss three ways to use essential oils for aroma therapy and relaxation at home.  
                 

Using Essential Oils for Relaxation    These ideas will help you to become more stilled and focused as you quiet your mind and body.  Try one and see how it works for you. 
As a caution: if you are new to essential oils, do a patch test on the inside of your wrist to make sure you're not allergic to the oil you have chosen. 
Essential oils are available at natural foods stores and from some natural health care practitioners.

Exercise One

Use any of the following essential oils in this exercise.  They help focus your thoughts: rosemary, peppermint or clary sage. 

Allow yourself some uninterrupted time to sit for a quiet 15 minutes.  Choose a room and a time that is free of distractions.  Your bedroom is often a good place, early in the morning, if possible.  Close the door, sit quietly on the floor or bed, and apply just a drop of essential oil to the palms of your hands.   Rub your palms together, then loosely cup your hands in front of your mouth and nose  (stay away from your eyes!) and breathe deeply to inhale the fragrance.  If you prefer, you can use a diffuser to diffuse the scent into the room.  As you do, focus on one positive thought or image; something for which you are truly grateful, or an image that uplifts you and makes you smile.
As distracting thoughts come, do not entertain them or allow them to sidetrack you, just let them slip by and continue to focus on your positive thought or image.  Stay in this state of quiet relaxation, breathing deeply for 15 minutes.

Exercise Two

            A stress reducing technique that is easy and enjoyable is to take a relaxation bath before gong to bed.  Make the water very warm and add a few drops of essential oil—lavender or geranium are very good, or find a combination oil that is specifically designed to relax the body and mind.  Placing a cup of Epsom salts into your bath will give the additional benefit of softening the water and drawing toxins from your body  (for more info on the benefits of putting epsom salts in your bath go to: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/health-benefits-of-epsom-salt-baths.html). 
         Soak for 15 to 30 minutes and let your mind be stilled from the day’s demands.   Breathe deeply, and mentally place yourself in a situation of relaxation and beauty—on the beach, in a woodland, observing a sunset from a mountain peak, etc.—focus on your imaginary surroundings, and be aware of the gratitude you feel, and the relaxation you are enjoying in this positive, safe and peaceful place.

           

Exercise Three

In the A.M. take a cool bath while burning candles that are made with energizing essential oils such as bergamot, vetiver, lemon, pine, basil, rosemary or peppermint.  Or, put essential oils into a diffuser in the bathroom while you bathe.   Allow the scent from your candles or diffuser to flow through you.  Take time to notice the smell and how it is affecting you.   Allow it to energize and propel you to a place that is, in your mental vision, very high—a mountain top, a hill, flying silently in a glider—a place from which you can observe life from a new perspective of enthusiasm and appreciation. 
Don't fall pray to negative thoughts or seeing the difficulties you may be facing just now.  Look out at your life and see your blessings.  Take time to count them and feel the joy they bring. Allow these images and feelings to remain with you throughout the day.  If necessary, pause to momentarily revisit your mountain top (or other high place) from time to time during the day and allow it to reenergize your spirit.

Have a wonderful day!

• Oils for Focus:  Rosemary, peppermint, clary sage
• Oils for Relaxation: Lavender, geranium, combination oils specifically labeled for quieting the mind and relaxing the body
• Oils for Energy: Bergamot, vetiver, lemon, pine, basil, rosemary, peppermint 

TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
No Matter How Crazy Life Is, Every Day Take Care Of Yourself.  Take Time To Be Still, To Reflect, To Relax A Little, To Pray.  Breathe Deeply And Focus On The Good In Life. 

The Uncertainty of Life

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         This week has found Americans living in uncertainty as Washington debates our national debt and how best to handle the state of our economy.  As a people we are, by turns, disgusted, anxious, fearful and frustrated, holding our collective breath to see what will happen next.
         But government wrangling is only part of our stress.  Add to it natural disasters, terrorist attacks, wars, and personal concerns, and it would be easy to conclude that the world has gone mad.  I suppose that, in many respects, pessimism may seem justified.   I'm no expert on political and financial matters, and I'm not a therapist, but I think I can be pretty sure where negative thinking will get us, and it isn't a desired destination.       

         I've asked myself, especially in light of what's happening in the United States at the moment, "What can I do to minimize my stress over our government's finances?"  Personally, I've found it helpful to be involved by studying the issues and contacting my representatives to let them know how I feel.  I have signed petitions and engaged in discussions.  Will it do any good?  I hope that my voice, mingled with many thousands of others, will be heard and that our leaders will choose to represent the people of this great nation, and not their own political interests.

         I've learned in my six decades that taking an active and interested role in life gives us a greater sense of control and empowerment, while sitting on the sidelines complaining can begin a downward spiral to feelings of depression and defeat.  I am grateful for the intellect God has given His children. I am grateful for the many times when I could get up, move my body and my mind and get involved to change my circumstances.
         Politically, I deeply appreciate living in a nation where I can voice my concerns and my opinions to my elected leaders.  While it can still be frustrating if they don't seem to be listening, I know that, in the future, their reelection depends on the voters.  If they haven't done a good job they can be replaced.
         If there is something in your life that is troubling you, consider the resources (both within yourself and outside yourself) that you can access to change the outcome of the things that are happening. 
         Worried that the economy will collapse or that you might lose your job?  In recent years, many people have resolved to pay off their debts, live on less than they make, and save money.  They have stored food, water, and medications for a time when these things might not be readily available.
         Worried about a natural disaster?  I know folks who have a 72 hour kit handy by their front door or in the trunk of their car.  It contains a change of clothing, some food and water, basic emergency medical supplies, a flashlight, matches, and other emergency essentials.  In the neighborhood I live in, we've been taught how to shut off water and gas should the need occur.  We've also discussed emergency plans for how to reach family members following a disaster.  I, personally, love the idea of choosing one family member in a distant location who is contacted after a disaster and given pertinent information.  Then other family members can call that same person to find out my whereabouts and condition.
         Worried about someone stealing your identity?  We all need to take precautions to safeguard our personal information, and many people take the further step of enlisting a paid service to assist them should such an event take place.
         The point is, we have been blessed with many resources and abilities. Getting up and getting involved, being prepared and pro-active, can help us feel better, have a greater sense of control, and enable us to be ready when difficulties occur.  I am so thankful there are things we can do to change our circumstances, and that we have many reasons to be grateful, in spite of the uncertainty of life.   
        (Note: On 7/22/11  I posted a link for a destress kit.  I am including that again.  Along with the above ideas, using the suggestions in the destress kit will help you to feel more grateful and confident as you manage the difficulties you face in life.   www.heartmath.org/destresskit ).   


TODAY'S INSPIRED QUOTATION:
"No one knows enough to be a pessimist."  
                                                                                 Dr. Wayne Dyer

Soul Aerobics

A new post will be published each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

         In 1999 I wrote a book for my graduation project from college.  It explored many aspects of gratitude, and contained essays and exercises designed to instill this attribute more deeply into the consciousness of the reader.
         In this unpublished manuscript I suggested that we practice an exercise that I called soul aerobics.  Soul aerobics is simply the habit of vigorously observing the beauties that surround us, then stretching ourselves by acting gratefully on those observations.  My belief was then, and continues to be, that in so doing we will find a deep sense of joy that fills our souls, increases our energy, and lifts our capacity for gratitude to new levels.
        Soul aerobics takes no special equipment except that with which God has already endowed us:  our eyes, our heart, our mind, and our strength.  But each of these must be in the proper condition if soul aerobics is to be effective.  Our eyes must be eyes that desire to be open and able to see.  Our heart must be softened and receptive;  our mind, anxious to be influenced by beauty; and our strength used to express our praise and gratitude to our Creator for blessing us so abundantly. 
         Soul aerobics also requires no specific level of income because everyone, everywhere can participate. Blessedly, the beauties we stretch ourselves to see and appreciate are the beauties which He has placed before all His children: the lovliness of  wildlife, trees and sky; the power of water cascading over rock; the gentleness of spring breezes; the wisdom in the face of an elderly friend; the twinkle in the eyes of a child; the elegance of well spoken words; the deep tranquility of a silent summer night.

         The Psamist David knew a lot about soul aerobics, for he not only had an agile mind, quick to perceive the wonders of God's universe, he was also able to stretch himself in deep appreciation for those gifts.  He sang in praise:

                   Oh Lord our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the earth!....When I

               consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars,

               which thou hast ordained, what is man that thou are mindful of him?  and

               the son of man, that thou visitest him?  For thou hast made him a little

               lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honor.  Thou

               madest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands, thou has put

               all things under his feet. (Psalms 8:1, 3-6).

         David marveled at and delighted in the great goodness of God, but more than that, he acted on his feelings by expressing profound appreciation.
         As I participate in soul aerobics, I find my heart rejoicing in the wonders of the earth, and in the abundance of natural gifts that God has placed here to bless our lives.  Not only has He trusted me with these gifts, giving them to me to enjoy, He has asked me to care for them, "to have dominion" over them.  How carefully I do that, and how joyfully and sincerely I express my appreciation of these gifts is a measure of my devotion to Him.
         Today, while going about the daily routines of life, pause to note the many opportunities there are to practice soul aerobics.  Allow some of your time, attention, heart and energy to be focused on the beautiful people and places around you.  Take it all in.  Delight in the joy it brings.  Marvel at the beauty you see, and experience the evidence of God's hand in these beauties.  At some point during your busy day, or before retiring tonight, simply give thanks to Heavenly Father for all these blessings and their ability to strengthen and uplift your soul.

TODAY'S AWESOME BLESSING:
The night was cool and perfect for sleeping.  It followed an evening of thunderstorms.  The rain last evening was heavy and wind driven.  It's rare to have rain like that here.  It was very much like the rain in New England.  I am grateful for that little taste of the east, because I've missed those marvelous, booming, thunderstorms with their torrential rains. 

Being a Good Traveling Companion

        A new blog will be posted each Monday, Wednesday and Friday

         Hope you had a great weekend. 
         I see I've had a few visits to this site this morning.  I'm thinking it must be my east coast followers.  I'll try to get this out a little earlier for you!
         On Friday I wrote about traveling in good company.  It's great when we have friends, neighbors and family who are so very thoughtful.  Such people have certainly been a great blessing in my life.  But I often ask myself, "What am I doing for others?" 
         I hope I'm a thoughtful neighbor and friend because, honestly, how hard is it for me to brighten someone's day or lighten their load?  An old retired gal, I'm at home now, taking care of my husband. That consumes a good deal of time on some days.  But on others, I certainly can spend a few minutes or hours doing the little things that would be helpful to my friends, or even a stranger in need.  I find that little acts of kindness are a wonderful way to say "thank you" to those who have done nice things for me, or simply to serve in my neighborhood and community.
         Some people call such service "random acts of kindness."  I like that term because it signifies that, as we develop a mindset of service to others, we find opportunities all over the place to do nice things.  We don't need an organized plan, or to make an appointment.  We begin to see needs, or we see opportunities to help out, and we just spring into action.
         How refreshing and uplifting would it be if we lived in a world where people saw ways of brightening the day for another and acted on it; a world where selfishness was a rare thing and service was the norm?  Frankly, when I see all that others do for me, I think I'm already living in that world, but I know that I can do better at reciprocating.
         So what do you say, those of you who follow this blog?  What random acts of kindness have you enjoyed doing for another?  Have you known:

• A widow who was blessed by your visit? 
• A busy mom who got downright giddy over a couple of hours to herself? 
• A teen who benefited from your listening ear?
• A neighbor who was ill and appreciated having a meal brought in?
• Someone in the hospital who enjoyed a visit?
• An elderly person who felt safer because you offered your companionship during his evening walk?
• One of your children who gobbled up some one-on-one time with you?
• Someone who was blessed as you shared a talent you have?

You probably have participated in many ways of helping others to travel through life more joyfully.  Those ways are as diverse and creative as any one of the many personalities who think them up.  And each of those acts not only blesses the person being remembered, it also makes the day of the giver brighter, too.  I honestly don't believe we can do an act of kindness without benefiting from it ourselves.  In fact, research shows that when we say or do something positive it releases beneficial hormones into our system, keeping us calmer, younger and healthier.  I'm for that!  I remember a well known doctor once saying that positive words increase the seratonin (a feel good hormone) levels of those who are standing nearby and simply overhear a positive conversation.
         Well, I looked out this morning and noticed the sky is a little gray.  It's a little cloudy out there.  So what can I do today to bring some sunshine into the world?
         As we travel the road of life, I hope that we'll frequently experience the uplift that comes from blessing another.  It will lighten our load and bring the glorious light of joy into the life of someone else; and in an extraordinary and wonderful way, it will also brighten the world!



TODAY'S GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT:
                                Help someone else along the way.